There’s a myth in our society that you can do anything you want if you want it bad enough.
I agree that most people set their sights way too low and settle for far less than they are capable of. But let’s face it, once you hit a certain age you’re likely not going to make a sudden successful career change from being a chartered accountant to fronting a top-selling rock band, or becoming a fifty-goal scorer in the National Hockey League. There are certain careers that are made for certain ages. That being said there are still ways to fulfill your dreams when they are “out of season”.
At 38, I decided I wanted to play in a rock band. I had an electric guitar as a teenager but was easily discouraged and quit before getting good at it. Now that I was older I wanted to really learn the instrument then and play on a stage. I got a guitar and an amp and practiced about 15 hours a week for a couple of years until I could play reasonably well. Then I went looking for band-mates.
It turns out a bunch of guys at my workplace had played in a band before and were thinking of re-forming the group. I got them to include me in their plans and within a year I was playing on a stage in front 200 paying customers. Our “fans” included many of my employees who knew about the show and were either intrigued or wanted to show their support.
Does this man look afraid? I'm so relaxed I'm mugging for the camera
Dealing with intense experience
I had never played to an audience before and had no idea how I would react. Fear could have easily taken hold. Would I get stage fright and freeze up? Would I get flustered or forget all the lyrics? The stakes were high. If I embarrassed myself, I’d be doing it in front of the very people whose respect was critical to my job.
The experience was so intense I can still go back in my mind and re-live it moment by moment.
I feel the hot lights on me as the band starts into the first song – a tune I not only have to play but SING. My heart is already in my mouth. I hit the strings to the first chord – NOTHING. NO SOUND. I can hear everyone else except myself. I play the first few bars of the intro and I feel all eyes on me.
I took a quick glance to look at all the links in the chain that can go wrong:
Amplifier on? – check!
Pedal board on?– check!
Tuner mute off? – check!
Why is this happening? I look at my band mates in the hope they’ll realize something is wrong. They’re not stopping.
Fear slowly creeps up my spine, but I remain clam, at least for now. Suddenly I realize the volume pot of my guitar is turned down to zero. I slide it up to ten and begin. The song goes better than we have ever rehearsed it. As I wail away on the guitar solo near the end of the tune it suddenly hits me -”I can’t believe I’m actually doing this. This is so damn cool. Life can’t possibly get any better than this moment.”
We do two sets. People are dancing and having a great time. All too quickly, it seems, it’s over. I’m sweaty, exhausted and totally buzzed as we load the equipment in the back of the van. Even carrying the heavy amplifiers seems fun. We’re rock stars!
The reaction of my employees was incredibly positive the next day. Word got around the company and people I didn’t know started stopping me in the halls to talk to me and ask me when our next gig would be.
The leap of faith
I don’t know of any management or leadership coach who would endorse what I had just done. Performing music on a stage in front of your employees ranks close to the top of the list of things you SHOULDN’T do, particularly if you’d never performed before. It’s just too risky and the stakes are too high if you fail. It’s also too easy to let fear overwhelm you.
But sometimes life isn’t about taking the safe road. I took a huge leap of faith – faith in myself – and it paid off with an amazing experience.
Have you had an experience where you banished fear and did something out of your comfort zone? How did it make you feel?
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For more stories like these check out Overcome Fear to Get What you Want in Life - now an audio book.
