The following is a guest post from coach and Women on Top founder Odette Laurie:
They say photo is worth a thousand words, but those words can be misleading.
My mother used to always say to me; What you see is what you get. Boy did I ever prove her wrong.
Take a look at this picture of me. I want you to take a really close look at it and tell me if you can find 10 or so things wrong with this picture. Hmmmm, I didn’t think so. Why? Because they can’t be seen with the naked eye.
This photo was taken of me a few days after my 45th birthday, in the scenic wine county of California. When I first saw it, I thought wow, do I ever look happy, healthy, wealth and wise, as the phrase sort of goes. In reality, I was feeling anything but, except the happy part. I was even more happy when I saw the photo because it didn’t show how I was really feeling. Fake it till you make it. And I made it. Thank goodness. Nobody really wants to see the bad stuff anyway so what do we do? We try and hide it.
I am just going to come right out with it; I was diagnosed with an auto-immune disorder 10 years ago and, quite frankly, I haven’t shared this news with too many people. Why not you ask? Because I am embarrassed. You chuckle, laugh, snort and gasp and think ‘that’s silly, there is nothing to be embarrassed about. If people knew they would understand’. Well I have told people and not everyone understands.
You see, on the outside I look perfectly normal. On the inside I am not. You don’t see a disease, an abnormality, a crooked walk or a crooked smile. You don’t see degeneration over time, except the aging kind. My issue is a life long, life altering disease that manifests itself from the inside out.
It all started one rainy day when I was sitting at my doctor’s office getting a routine check up. He said to me, ‘How are you feeling Odette? You look a little under the weather.’ I said, ‘oh the usual, you know, after having a second baby I am sure I am just as tired and worn out like all other moms with toddlers and babes’. ‘Hmm’, he said. ‘If you don’t mind I’d like to run a few tests on you.”
About a week later I get a call from my doctor’s secretary. You know when the doctor calls and asks to see you, it usually isn’t good news. I am told I have a disease that is not reversible. I didn’t hear anything else he said after that.
Ten years in, it still frustrates the hell out of me because it interferes with my day to day existence and it has slowed me down. Me? Triple-A personality. Slow down? No way but, ya, it’s the new way. So now I live year after year after year trying to ‘look normal’ and ‘be normal’ but really I am anything but. Ahhhh, but now there is hope! I am only too selfish when I say this; I am really happy that a celebrity athlete has the same disease that I do! Thank God someone with a bigger voice than I will make this disease a household name. Phew, I am all of a sudden not embarrassed anymore. Sorry Venus you made my day but I am sorry that you are stricken with this as it will impair the rest of your life.
I have Sjogrens Syndrome, and so does a professional tennis player! This disease is not common, especially among younger women. This is great news for me, that someone else shares my disease because now she will talk about it…to the public. I can hide behind Venus now! My public will now understand. All I have to say is this; I have that disease that Venus has and people will know what I am talking about. It’s true, I already started using this technique. I don’t have to hide the reason why I have to use eye drops several times an hour, why my mouth is dry and I need to always carry a bottle of water with me or have to pause in between speaking gigs to take a sip. I don’t have to fake it anymore when my fingers go white with lack of blood flow or why I need to have a hot bath every night to ease my aching joints.
There are plenty more ‘issues’ that I have with this disease that can’t be seen in a photo, no matter how professional the photographer is. Besides what I just mentioned here’s what else you don’t see in the photo:
- My increased chance of getting lymphoma cancer (only about 7% chance higher);
- My fibromyalgia;
- The amount of drugs I take to ease this pain or that pain, and drugs to protect my body from the harm the other drugs I take to make my life a little less daunting;
- My fatigue that strikes when I least expect it;
- My difficulty sleeping and then the difficulty waking;
- My joints that are sore from the neck on down, not always and not always at the same time.
- That my teeth were worked on because of erosion due to a lack of saliva.
The worst part is the irritability. It’s all understandable I am told, but when I am grumpy, funny how people don’t feel so understanding. When I plan to do something, I need to plan my rest, my drugs, my mood. Spontaneity is no longer my friend. This all is a full time job.
So back to the picture. What do you see? You see a 40 something woman with blonde hair smiling. You perceive her to be happy, healthy, wealthy and wise (or something along those lines). Yes I am happy. I am happy Because I have a disease that is invisible, non-degenerative like Lupus or MS. I am happy I have a disease that is manageable and tolerable – “ just a nuisance” as my doctor tells me. I am happy because I am healthier than a lot of people. I am happy that I have a disease that you can’t see from the outside. I am happy because it could be worse. I am happy just because….
Odette Laurie entrepreneur and founder of Women on Top, has lived and breathed the life of the women she coaches. Odette understands that entrepreneurial spirit, having developed a mere idea into a thriving business, while wearing all the hats from janitor to President. Odette built that business to multiple six figures in 3 years. Her passion and affinity for hard work earned her the York Business Centre’s “Entrepreneur of the Year” award, as well as a solid offer to purchase. 10 years later with a number of varying business ventures under her belt, Odette looks back fondly at the one that started it all, and is proud to see it still running profitably.
Women On Top, works with you in any area of your life that needs a pick me up, a boost or a push. Whether it is starting a new career or even your dream business, Women On Top combines the personal and the professional to enhance your performance and create long lasting, sustainable success. If you are in a personal funk such as divorce, job loss or any life transition, they will peel away the layers, discover what makes you tick, and build you back up to where you want to be in life.
Odette has written a guide called ‘How big is your But?’ Why you are hiding behind it and how to break free. You can download it from her website at Women on Top
